Tears in my eyes...

I woke up this morning with tears in my eyes. I dreamed of my mother expressing how she loves me through words written on a sheet of paper. Although it was just a short dream but it was so clear that made me cry. When I woke up, I remember that February 13, next day will be my sister’s 3^rd year death anniversary and cried more.

We have a gap with my family right now. 3 weeks ago, I texted my family that March will be my last financial support to them which I think threaten them. I told them that I am planning to go home soon and needs enough funds for me to start back home. For the last few months or when the crisis hits Dubai, my income is getting worse compared to what I had on my first two years. Before, I can support them at least on what they request but this time, I felt anxious. I feel insecure on my financial status, career or even self-actualization. For the last 5 years of working on this company, I am still on the same position. No promotion, no increments. There are lots of questions bothering me lately that lead me to depression. Envy, jealousy or greed might be the word to say but wither it is less or more it still exists on my body.

I don’t know where to start but one thing for sure, I am not ready to go back home yet. I have a better life here in Dubai compare to what is waiting for me in Davao. There might be misconception on how I see life lately but I don’t have a choice except to accept and embrace it, face the challenges and be strong.

The following might help me:

• Pray
• I will love my self first and stop pushing to the limits if it’s not possible. Enjoy and Relax, spend, indulge.
• Be contended and work on what you have: ask less act more
• Don’t fight with my friends here in Dubai
• Try to detach a little bit or put a gap to my family. Anyway, my family is always my home base.
• Envy, greed and jealousy. Channel it in the right way. How? Think this: their experience might be worse than what you have
• Focus on plans
• Etc, etc…

“Bahala na si Batman!” I am not use with this phrase but what I can do.

Stress Relieved

Because I was not invited on my friend’s (AMOR) birthday party, I contented myself browsing the photos I took during my vacation in the Philippines last April – May, 2009.

Look what I’ve got! My close friend, in jeans...

From Brusko Gwapito young man to….

Katrina Halili wanna be! bwahahahahahaha!


So girls, be careful of whom you kiss for.

I miss this guy terribly. Thanks bro! Hanggang sa muling pagkikita.

Stress relieved.

Uninvited

I was bothered of the noise from the room in front of my window (Amor’s place – Spa Therapist). They were shouting for joy and singing happy birthday to which I don’t know who is the celebrant. I try to busy myself doing personal stuff but my mind keep on asking why I was not invited. Going to parties here without invitation is a common, but I seldom do that or if not at all times. I was also tempted to peek from my window on what is going on and felt bad that most of my close colleagues and friends were at the party.

I contended myself the privilege to be alone. I browse the internet and watch video clips: Pinoy Big Brother, TV Patrol, and some music video from youtube were just a few I watched. I updated my personal bulletin board on the wall and vacuum the floors. Lastly, writing this blog entry.

People from the party might be happy if I join them. But, I decided to stay in my room for my personal belief and principle that you have to sacrifice for a greater pleasure. I might miss the party this evening but who knows, I might not enjoy if I push myself. Or, there might be a big celebration to come that those who did not invite me will cry of envy, (BITTER Ocampo) lol!

Bed Bar – My Virgin Access

I was 20 when I first read article about Bed Bar, the most famous gay-oriented bar in the Philippines. From that time my curiosity in the place increased and promised myself that I will go no matter what it takes. I will fly from Davao City to Manila to experience gay life in the Big City.

Friday – April 3, 2009 all curiosity that I had 9 years ago about Bed Bar was answered. It was a night full of laughter, dancing, drinking and of fun during my vacation in the Philippines from working here in Dubai.

When we were at the Entrance with my cousin Charlie, I already have idea what will happen. I hesitantly asked the lady on the ticket booth of what is inside and she asked me if I’m straight. I only answered her smile and she immediately teased me “uyyyyy! Si Sir pa-effect!” which means she did not instantly recognise me as gay.

We entered the place quite early and found out that there were less people inside, so we decided to sit on the nearby bar. After a round of beer we decided to get inside and were surprised how the place attracted club goers to its maximum capacity.

This is it, the party of a lifetime. I saw different gay people on their best look drinking and dancing with gorgeous hunk men half naked dancing on the top of the ledge. I was so happy and enjoying every minute. When suddenly, Charlie grabbed me to the side and wants me to meet a common friend. It was Joseph, a gay guy from Lebanon whom we’ve met and fucked with in Dubai. He loves Pinoys so much. I was overwhelmed to see him in the place and want to show how warm Filipinos are but he asked me if I am drunk. I think I scared him instead of showing my hospitality.

Then I met Doc Tony who used to take photos in the place and gave the password to access his gallery online. I also met Mugen, a blogger whom I followed for some time. He was one of the personalities I am planning to meet during my vacation and it happened unexpectedly. I was also invited by a group of 3 to go with them after the night but was so scared to dive in because I don’t know the city very well. Public Display of Affection was also very open and rampant, I saw couples holding their hands together and kissing without care to others.

The staff and waiters are very friendly as well and very sensitive on the guests’ needs. No wonder why this bar, despite the crisis still pass the border line. Still the most visited gay dance club in the Philippines.

The night ended with coffee on the street in front of Silya. It was very memorable. My curiosity in the place was not only answered but I met people who can understand each other. I feel like a cell phone fully charged by the good vibes I get from the place.

The following day, Saturday, we went back (hehehe!) and still have fun.

Now, memories are still on and going back to Bed Bar is still on my list to visit when I will have my vacation this December. My virgin pass was a great pleasure that needs to be revisited if not regularly.

Ciao!

Dolphin Show & Chinese Circus

We were lucky to be invited for the opening day of the Chinese Circus and Dolphin Spectacular Show at Dubai Creek Park’s Dolphinarium. The show cost Dhs. 120 (Php 1,500) per person but thanks to yours truly that we get it for free by communicating to their sales manager. The hotel also provided us with transportation so it was a hassle and expense free trip.

I was with Geraldine (Business Center Secretary) Leya, Rubi, Wendy (Guest Relations Officer) Aileen (OTS) Supervisor, Amor (Spa Therapist).

The show was great although most of the time were Chinese Circus performers were on stage. But I was amazed when the dolphins had their time. Dancing, flipping on the air, were just few of their tricks. The seals were equally outstanding as well. I keep on asking myself how long they spent to teach these creatures.

We departed the place with empty stomach so we decided to eat. It was the best McDonalds’ food I ever tasted for years. I finished 2 cheese burgers, large fries, and large coke in less than 20 minutes. GUTOM!
We had fun.

EOTM Partaayyyy!

As promised I will be posting some snapshots from the party celebrating yours truly and some close friends after I received the award as employee of the month (EOTM). Before anything else, I would like to thank Gilbert and Bregis, my 5* chefs for giving their time.
The party started at 8pm and blasted at around 10pm when most of the afternoon shift came. It was just a simple dinner (3 dishes) but loads of Indian whisky bottles. Automatically, BANGENGE!
I’m a party addict to the point I do gate crash, but making one is so exhausting. Preparation, expenses, and the after party realization: cleaning, washing, and hang-over.

Nevertheless, no regret. Share your blessing. My apology to those whom I want to be with but the invitation was not up for them due to circumstances.
To all who came to celebrate with me, Thank You!